

I’m not claiming that everyone’s ideal should be to find most political discussions boring (though plenty I personally do). A friend sitting next to me whispered sarcastically, “Great, you just brought up politics.” And indeed, the next five minutes were wholly predictable, with the same old points and typical tenseness. This happened to me a few weeks ago when I accidentally led a Shabbos meal conversation to the topic of whether or not American Jews should view Israel policy as the most important factor when considering a political candidate. Thankfully, it seems to me that most of these feuds happen between two or three people at a table, as the others more or less step back and wait for the conversation to move on. That this state of affairs is even recognizable is unfortunate. Less important than making a convincing case is catching one’s opponent off-guard so that he or she has no quick response. Rather than looking to learn from each other, these discussions often become disputations where each participant’s goal is to gain the moral high ground by outperforming the other’s sharpness and wit. For various reasons, people often have remarkably strong feelings about their political opinions.

While most of us probably can’t orchestrate elaborate Adele parodies to restore mealtime harmony, I believe there is what to learn from SNL’s parable. By the end of the absurd rendition all conflict is apparently resolved. Luckily, though, the little girl blasts the song one more time to save the day. Grandparents then walk in and, interrupting the music, briefly reignite the quarrelling. The younger woman becomes tense, and the screen flashes with the words, “Thanksgiving with family can be hard.” A few more seconds and all of the adults are yelling cacophonously, and the screen flashes, “Everyone has different opinions and beliefs.” Then, the little girl walks aside to a speaker device to play Adele’s “Hello” for her family to hear, and they all begin singing and acting along together. Only a few seconds after the father-figure announces that he is thankful to have his family around, the aunt mentions the Syrian refugees. There’s also an aunt, as well as a girl who is seven or eight years old. There is an older couple who are the parents of a middle-aged woman who has brought her husband along. In one sketch, a family of six is sitting around a Thanksgiving feast. I was reminded of this phenomenon’s ubiquity more recently while watching Saturday Night Live this past November.
THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY TV
The more I opened my eyes, the more portrayals I found of eerily similar situations, whether in TV shows, movies, or various online forums. The author described the familiar scenario of relatives and friends arguing about politics, and I was amazed at how closely this description resembled what I’ve unfortunately experienced a few times for myself.
THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY HOW TO
It was about how to deal with family arguments during holiday-season meals. Then, a few years ago, I was browsing a certain news website and found on the front page an interesting advice article. I used to assume that this phenomenon was unique to my circles. All exhale with relief at having made it through the topic of politics.

After a few minutes the ping-pong exchange will die off, and all will be quiet for just a moment. The talking points will proceed predictably, almost verbatim the same squabble as from a previous meal. Soon enough the motions of political arguing commence. Everyone at the table knows how these conversations go, and of course today is no different. No one is arguing yet, but it is inevitable. I suspect you too tensed a bit as you just now read the words “Mexican immigrants.” The innocent little phrase just as well could have been about taxes, gun control, Obamacare, Planned Parenthood, or global warming. There’s a general comfortable feeling.Īt some point Mexican immigrants are mentioned, and the air suddenly grows heavy. As one conversation leads easily to another there is a pleasant hum of relaxed chatter. Conversations transition between a single group exchange and several different temporary clusters schmoozing about this and that. A few families are eating together and everyone is making pleasant headway through the food and discussions.
